At The Heart of True Living

In the days of Aristotle and Plato, the heart was considered the location of the soul. Many centuries later, even with the new understanding of human anatomy, the heart has maintained its status as the seat of our feelings--the depths of our soul that gives our lives meaning and purpose.

We all feel joy and sorrow. They manifest within our hearts both physically and ethereally. It is often said that my heart aches or my heart has skipped a beat. The chemical processes are real as are the mental processes that get us there. These processes are influenced by what we experience. What we hear. Words are usually at the forefront of our experiences. How we interpret them at any particular point in time will determine our reactions.

Sometimes we feel strong and secure. Other times we feel vulnerable and insecure. When we were young children, we learned the phrase sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt me. Well, some times they do. Sometimes the right person, at the right time, says that one thing, and we are broken, crushed.

In my first book Always Protect Your Behind, I discuss the power of words. How we use our words will define our character and reveal the limits of our knowledge. Facts must always be verified from the original source. Then we must decide whether dissemination of these facts will have a useful benefit to the receiver. Or do we choose to breed chaos and despair?

American writer Mark Twain wrote that It is not wise to keep the fires going under a slander unless you can get some large advantage out of keeping it alive. Few slanders can stand the wear of silence. It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart; the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you.

It is after such an experience that we have choices in how to respond. Or do we let others tell us what course of action to take? Shakespeare wrote in his classic Antony & Cleopatra (III iv 35), where Antony tells Octavia that he must defend his honor after the slight by Caesar. How does one go about defending one’s honor? I guess it depends on whether you are an adult with an understanding of right and wrong, or a child who acts upon a random whim. The choice will further define your character and the ultimate consequences of those original words.

We cannot always control the words or actions of others. But we can control our own words and actions. We have to ask ourselves do we want satisfactory results or further chaos? A tangled web or smooth sailing through life? Do we build up one another or tear each other down? The best answer is found in a classic book of time proven moral choices--the Bible. The answer to our current dilemma of maintaining healthy hearts in the midst of our experiences lies in the wisdom found there. We do have a source of hope.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen (Ephesians 4:29 NIV). We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. Each of us should please our neighbors for their good, to build them up. For even Christ did not please himself but, as it is written: “The insults of those who insult you have fallen on me.” For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope (Romans 15:1-4 NIV).  So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding (Romans 14:19 ESV).